Lin Hai and Liu Xinyue spent a long time cuddling in the car. It wasn’t until they could barely hold themselves back anymore that they reluctantly said goodbye.
Lin Hai went home. Song Qin had just finished cooking, so he made it in time for dinner.
“Xiao Hai, you got me the tickets for the Qingge Competition, right? I still need to watch my future daughter-in-law compete tomorrow.” At the dinner table, Song Qin asked Lin Hai.
“I’m going too.” Lin Wen said while eating his rice with his head down.
“Brother, me too! I heard Zhao Ying is coming. She’s my idol—I love her songs the most.” Lin Yun chimed in from the side.
“I’ve got them, I’ve got them all.” Lin Hai took out the tickets and placed them on the dinner table.
Lin Yun grabbed the tickets in one swift move.
“Wow! Front row! That’s amazing! I can see my idol up close!” Lin Yun cheered excitedly.
“Hey, Yun Yun, are you going tomorrow to cheer for Xinyue or to see your idol?” Lin Hai’s face was covered in dark lines.
“Both!” Lin Yun pursed her little lips and said smugly.
“You sure have a lot of idols.” Lin Hai muttered.
“Daddy, Daddy, I want to go watch the Qingge Competition too. Are there a lot of female dogs at the Qingge Competition?” Ah Hua ran over wagging its tail.
Pfft!
Damn it, this dead dog. All it ever thinks about is female dogs.
“Get lost!” Lin Hai kicked Ah Hua to the side.
“Xiao Hai, you kid, why do you keep bullying Ah Hua? Ah Hua is so cute.” Song Qin immediately got upset and poked Lin Hai’s forehead with her finger.
“Ah Hua, don’t be scared. If he kicks you again, I’ll beat him up!” Song Qin said, then picked up a piece of meat and tossed it to Ah Hua.
“Woof woof woof.” Ah Hua acted all cute toward Song Qin, making her laugh nonstop.
“Hmm?” Seeing Song Qin feed Ah Hua, Lin Hai suddenly remembered something.
He got up and went to his bedroom, opened WeChat’s Qiankun Bag.
Inside was still a portion of dog food for the Howling Celestial Dog that the Jade Rabbit had given him.
Extract!
Lin Hai extracted the dog food.
Pfft!
“Jade Rabbit, screw you!” Lin Hai let out a miserable howl!
Looking at the smelly, steaming, sticky, yellowish-brown thing in his hand, Lin Hai immediately felt nauseous.
If this isn’t poop, then what the hell is it?
That bastard Jade Rabbit, you want to give this to me to eat? I’ll eat your damn head!
It was way too disgusting. Lin Hai felt he had to get rid of it immediately, or he’d definitely throw up on the spot.
He was just about to go wash his hands when Ah Hua came running in wagging its tail, looking delighted.
“Wow, so yummy! Daddy, what good stuff are you sneaking?”
I’m sneaking your sister!
Can this stuff even be eaten?
“Daddy, what’s that good stuff in your hand?” Ah Hua finally found the source of the smell, and its little eyes lit up.
“This is specially prepared for you. Come here, I’ll treat you to some poop.” Lin Hai waved Ah Hua over grumpily.
“Really? Awesome, thank you Daddy!” Ah Hua pounced over excitedly.
Lin Hai quickly held out his hand.
“Come on, lick it clean. Hurry up.”
No need for Lin Hai to say anything—Ah Hua had already pounced forward and taken Lin Hai’s hand into its mouth.
“Delicious, so delicious!” Ah Hua finished it in just a few bites, then used its wet big tongue to lick every crevice between Lin Hai’s fingers.
“Daddy, is there more?” After finishing, Ah Hua looked at Lin Hai pitifully, clearly not having had enough.
“Damn, you still want more? Want me to poop one out for you right now?” Lin Hai kicked Ah Hua to the side in annoyance and went into the bathroom to wash his hands.
“Daddy, Daddy.” Ah Hua wagged its tail and followed him in.
“Damn, why are you coming in? Are you really waiting for me to poop one out for you?”
“No, Daddy, I need to poop.” Ah Hua said urgently.
“Damn, if you need to poop, go outside. Why come in here?” Lin Hai quickly kicked it.
“It’s too late, Daddy.”
Pfft!
A stench spread out, nearly making Lin Hai stagger.
“Damn you, you dead dog, you’re way too annoying!” Lin Hai was so angry he almost lost it.
“So satisfying, Daddy. Clean it up for me, okay? I suddenly want to sleep.” Ah Hua walked out with its head held high and chest puffed out.
Clean up your sister! I’ll stew you!
Looking at the big pile Ah Hua had left on the floor, Lin Hai was so furious he chased after it and gave it two more kicks.
Damn, talk about bad luck. Not only did he get it on his hand, now it was all over the floor too. If he’d known, he wouldn’t have fed it.
Holding his nose, he cleaned up the bathroom and returned to the bedroom feeling thoroughly depressed.
“Hmph!” Just as he lay down on the bed, Chu Lin’er let out a cold snort and turned her head away, refusing to look at Lin Hai.
“Oh, what’s wrong, Princess Lin’er?” Lin Hai smiled and said.
“Hmph!” Chu Lin’er snorted again.
“Tsk, what a temper.” Seeing that Chu Lin’er was ignoring him, Lin Hai couldn’t be bothered to deal with her either. He directly took out his phone.
Ding dong!
Just as he opened WeChat, he saw several messages.
Lin Hai looked—they were all from the Yaochi Fairy.
Yaochi Fairy: Fellow immortal, how’s the face mask situation going?
Yaochi Fairy: Fellow immortal, are you there?
Yaochi Fairy: Hello? Anyone?
Lin Hai saw they were all from half an hour ago. He was just about to reply when another message from the Yaochi Fairy came through.
Yaochi Fairy: A lot of fairies have come to bathe. Do you want to watch?
Holy crap, there’s such a good thing?
Little Confused Immortal: Watch, of course I’ll watch. [Followed by a drooling emoji]
Yaochi Fairy: Bah, despicable, shameless, filthy!
Uh, screw you!
Lin Hai felt depressed. Damn, you’re the one who messaged me and asked if I wanted to watch, okay?
Yaochi Fairy: Earlier when I called you, you never replied. Now that I mention fairies bathing, you instantly reply. You’re really shameless.
Damn, I wasn’t even here earlier, okay? Lin Hai felt he was being wrongly accused.
Little Confused Immortal: Just tell me, what’s the matter?
Lin Hai felt quite depressed. Why was everything going so badly today?
Yaochi Fairy: I’m asking you, what’s the situation with the face masks?
Little Confused Immortal: They’re not ready yet. Just wait.
Those ten buckets of Yaochi water were still sitting in the Sacred Realm. Who knew when Ye Ziyu’s side would start production?
Lin Hai didn’t understand business, so he couldn’t be bothered to worry about it.
Yaochi Fairy: So slow? [Followed by a surprised emoji]
Little Confused Immortal: Yeah, making these face masks is very complicated. It’s not as simple as you think. Just wait patiently. I’ll let you know when they’re ready.
“Hmph, hmph hmph hmph hmph hmph!” Suddenly, Chu Lin’er let out a string of hmphs.
“Damn, did a pig get in here?” Lin Hai made an exaggerated expression.
“Bah, you’re the pig! Big stupid pig, big perverted pig!” Chu Lin’er pouted her little mouth and glared at Lin Hai angrily.
“Oh, so it’s Princess Lin’er. What are you hmphing about for no reason? I thought a pig had run in.” Lin Hai said with a mischievous smile.
“I’m hmphing because I’m mad!” Chu Lin’er glared with her big eyes and said angrily.
“Mad? Who dares mess with our Princess Lin’er? Tell me, big brother will go beat them up for you!” Lin Hai put on an expression of righteous indignation.
“The person who made me mad is you!”
“Me? How did I make you mad?” Lin Hai was confused.
“Those emojis you sent me—I won’t even mention the name—but the content inside is way too shameless!!!”
