My Amazing WeChat is Connected to the Three Realms - Chapter 100

“Hey, what exactly does this ‘Second-Class Yin Officer’ do?” Lin Hai asked irritably.

“The Second-Class Yin Officer is a rank among the underworld bailiffs. Now that you’ve become one, you have an official position in the underworld. It’s a good thing.” Chu Lin’er’s eyes curved into happy crescents.

“Cut the nonsense. Just tell me, what exactly can a Second-Class Yin Officer do?”

“What can a Second-Class Yin Officer do? Oh, lots of things! For example, you can communicate with spirits.” Chu Lin’er looked clever and adorable.

You’ve got to be kidding me! Lin Hai’s face darkened.

“Brother can already communicate with spirits, okay?” Lin Hai felt scammed.

“Just communicating isn’t interesting. Once you become a Second-Class Yin Officer, you can work as an underworld bailiff.”

“Underworld bailiff? What’s that?” Lin Hai asked, his face still dark.

“Underworld bailiff? For example, soul-summoners are bailiffs. You can catch ghosts, isn’t that fun?” Chu Lin’er hopped around excitedly beside him, looking utterly delighted.

Damn, if I can catch ghosts, the first one I’d catch is you, you dead girl!

Lin Hai cursed inwardly.

“Huh? Wait a minute, soul-summoner? Damn, isn’t that just Hei Wuchang (Black Impermanence)?” Lin Hai suddenly realized.

“Exactly! And since you’re a Second-Class Yin Officer, you can directly be a mid-level soul-summoner. For example, whenever ferocious ghosts appear, that’ll all be your job, haha.” Chu Lin’er suddenly started giggling.

“What? What do you mean, ‘whenever ferocious ghosts appear, that’s my job’?” Lin Hai felt something was increasingly off.

“What I mean is…” Chu Lin’er was interrupted as her phone suddenly rang.

“Wait a moment.” She opened it and saw a message from King Chu Jiang.

Chu Lin’er’s smile grew even brighter.

“Hey, what are you grinning about so weirdly?” Lin Hai suddenly had a bad feeling.

“Congratulations! Your official robes and seal have arrived.”

Ding-dong!

Lin Hai’s WeChat chimed.

He opened it to see:

Chu Lin’er has sent you a set of black formal attire for a soul-summoner.
Chu Lin’er has sent you a set of white formal attire for a soul-summoner.
Chu Lin’er has sent you a Soul-Locking Chain.

Pfft!

You’ve got to be kidding me!

Brother has really become Hei Bai Wuchang (Black and White Impermanence)!

Lin Hai felt like crying.

“Haha, from now on, whenever ferocious ghosts appear, this princess won’t have to go catch them herself. Finally, I can play Go-moku in peace.” Chu Lin’er hopped and skipped away, floating off.

Lin Hai stood rooted to the spot, dumbfounded. After a long while, he let out a miserable howl.

“This is so damn frustrating!!!”

Ding-dong!

His phone chimed with another WeChat notification.

Lin Hai opened it dejectedly.

“Huh?”

Ox-Head (Chu) requests to add you as a friend!

Holy crap, Ox-Head? Could it be the Ox-Head and Horse-Face from the underworld?

Lin Hai tapped ‘Accept’.

Ox-Head (Chu): New guy?

Lin Hai broke into a cold sweat. Damn, what’s with this ‘new guy’ nonsense?

Ox-Head (Chu): Starting directly as a Second-Class Yin Officer? I don’t care whose connections you have. From now on, since you’re working under me, you better follow the rules, got it?

Got your grandma’s rules!

Lin Hai was already furious about the whole situation.

Seeing this Ox-Head act all high and mighty from the get-go, speaking in a lecturing tone, Lin Hai’s anger flared up instantly.

Little Confused Immortal: Piss off!

In the underworld, Ox-Head was lounging with his legs crossed, holding his phone. A female spirit was diligently massaging his shoulders from behind, and he wore an expression of pure enjoyment.

But upon seeing Lin Hai’s reply, his face instantly darkened.

“Damn it! A new guy, relying on some connections, dares to look down on me? Hmph, your days will be tough from now on!”

Lin Hai returned to his villa and collapsed onto the bed.

He had experienced too much that day. Moreover, his fight with Hu Lai and his son had left him with serious internal injuries. Although he had regulated his energy and wasn’t in critical condition, he was utterly exhausted.

Soon, Lin Hai fell into a deep sleep.

He didn’t know how long he slept.

In his dream, Lin Hai was doing something intimate with Liu Xinyue.

Liu Xinyue, completely naked, lay on top of him. Her agile tongue lightly licked his cheek.

Lin Hai felt an itch and woke up.

“Holy crap! What the hell!” As soon as he opened his eyes, Lin Hai saw a long, red tongue licking his face, making it all wet.

“Dad, you’re finally awake.”

Only then did Lin Hai see whose long tongue it was, and he immediately felt disgusted.

“Damn it, you stupid dog, get off!” Lin Hai kicked A’Hua off the bed.

“Damn it! If you dare lick me again, brother will stew you!” Lin Hai walked into the bathroom, vigorously washing the saliva off his face.

“Dad, Dad, your phone is ringing.” A’Hua barked outside the bathroom.

Lin Hai picked up his phone and saw over twenty missed calls, all from Liu Xinyue.

“Damn!” Lin Hai suddenly remembered. He was so tired yesterday that he forgot to call Liu Xinyue to let her know he was safe after returning.

She must have been worried sick.

Sure enough, as soon as he answered, Liu Xinyue’s voice, tinged with tears, came through.

“Lin Hai, you scared me to death! Why didn’t you call me when you got back? And you didn’t answer your phone.”

“Uh… I was too tired yesterday, I forgot.” Lin Hai scratched his nose awkwardly.

“Hmph!” Liu Xinyue huffed, clearly still angry.

“Alright, I was wrong. Be good, Xinyue, don’t be angry. When we meet, brother will make it up to you properly. That kind of making up, you know what I mean.” Lin Hai said with a mischievous tone.

“I don’t want that, you jerk.” Liu Xinyue replied coyly, but the anger was clearly gone from her voice.

They chatted a bit more before hanging up.

With nothing to do, Lin Hai saw Chu Lin’er lying on his bed playing Go-moku. Remembering yesterday’s events, his anger flared up again.

He snatched the phone from her hands.

“Hey, are you crazy? Give me back my phone!”

“Give it back, my foot! You screwed me over big time yesterday. Give me back those 1,000,000 Yin Virtue points. I don’t want to be this damn Second-Class Yin Officer anymore.”

A triumphant smile spread across Chu Lin’er’s bewitching face.

“Well…” Chu Lin’er deliberately drew out the word.

Lin Hai’s eyebrows shot up. He had only said it in anger, but judging by Chu Lin’er’s tone, there might be a chance?

Lin Hai hurried over and started massaging Chu Lin’er’s legs with extreme eagerness.

“Princess Lin’er, you’re a princess! Isn’t this just a matter of you saying the word? Please, I’m begging you, don’t make me be that damn Yin Officer anymore.”

As he spoke, Lin Hai pulled up Chu Lin’er’s arm and started massaging it gently.

“Here, right here. Yes, that’s the spot. A bit harder.” Chu Lin’er closed her eyes, looking thoroughly enjoy.

You old bastard, you sure know how to boss people around, Lin Hai cursed inwardly.

After a round of serving Chu Lin’er, Lin Hai was sweating from the effort.

“So, Princess Lin’er, about what we just discussed…” Lin Hai said with an ingratiating smile.

“Just now? What was that?” Chu Lin’er looked utterly blank.

You’ve got to be kidding me! Lin Hai’s face darkened again.

“Th-that thing about not making me be an underworld bailiff.”

“Oh, that.” Chu Lin’er seemed to suddenly remember.

“Yes, yes, that! Princess Lin’er, you see…” Lin Hai looked at her expectantly.

“You’re already officially registered in the underworld’s official records. Not even I, nor even my father, the King, can do anything about it now.” Chu Lin’er shrugged.

You old bastard!

Lin Hai immediately tossed aside Chu Lin’er’s arm, which he had been massaging.

If you can’t do anything about it, why put on airs? Damn it, you made brother serve as your masseur for half the day.

“Hehe, your immediate superior is Ox-Head, right?” Chu Lin’er suddenly said, though the smile on her face sent a shiver down one’s spine.

“Yeah, an ‘Ox-Head (Chu)’ added me as a friend. Why?”

“Nothing, nothing, just asking.” Chu Lin’er giggled and waved her hand dismissively.

Laugh all you want!

Lin Hai immediately sensed there was definitely something going on.

But Lin Hai could tell this Chu Lin’er was a cunning little spirit. Even if he asked, she wouldn’t tell him, so he simply couldn’t be bothered to inquire further.

Just then, his phone rang again. Lin Hai looked and saw it was Liu Xinyue.

“Xinyue, missing me already after just a few minutes?” Lin Hai said with a playful grin.

“Jerk, who’s missing you? Don’t flatter yourself.” Liu Xinyue replied shyly.

“I was so angry earlier I forgot to tell you. Come over for dinner at my place tonight.” Liu Xinyue said and hung up.

“This girl, we’ve even kissed, yet she’s still so shy.” Lin Hai shook his head with a smile.

“Huh? That’s right!” Thinking about going over for dinner tonight reminded Lin Hai of something important.