“Okay, Mom, I’ll be right there!” Lin Hai had been at school practicing songs with Liu Xinyue when he got Song Qin’s call. He quickly hopped in his car and drove over.
By the time he arrived, a dense crowd had already gathered. Everyone in the onlooking circle wore expressions of curiosity and excitement as they peered inside.
A few people had their phones out, snapping photos and shooting video nonstop, as if some great show was unfolding right in front of them.
Lin Hai parted the crowd and walked in.
Pfft!
The moment he got inside, he burst out laughing.
Holy crap, the scene before him was just way too hilarious.
There was Zhao Kun lying on the ground, howling like a ghost, his clothes torn to shreds—looking every bit like a beggar.
Ahua was straddling Zhao Kun’s legs, its front paws resting on his chest, its doggy head working hard to rip off his underwear.
“You stupid mutt, get off me!” Zhao Kun was on the verge of tears. If those pants came off, he’d be famous—and not in a good way. Hadn’t he noticed all those people holding up their phones?
This was definitely going straight onto the internet.
“Wahaha! Go for it—rip his undies off!”
“Doggy, I believe in you!”
“They say Teddy dogs screw everything—the sky, the earth, the air itself. How about you screw him right here in public today!”
The crowd, loving every second of the chaos, was cheering and cackling like it was the best show ever.
“Hey, Zhao Kun, stop fighting it already! Let your big bro enjoy some good entertainment!” Meng Xu was standing off to the side, eyes practically sparkling. Not only did he not help, but he actually ran over and pinned down Zhao Kun’s legs.
“Damn it! Young Master Meng, you’re screwing me over!” Zhao Kun was losing his mind.
Lin Hai laughed for a while, but seeing the crowd grow larger, he knew he had to put a stop to this.
“Ahua, let him go!”
“Hold on, Dad, I’m not done having fun yet.” Ahua’s little eyes blinked excitedly.
“Have fun with your doggy head!” Lin Hai kicked Ahua right off Zhao Kun.
But as luck would have it, Ahua had its teeth clamped onto Zhao Kun’s waistband. That kick sent the underwear—which Zhao Kun had valiantly defended for so long—flying off with Ahua.
“Uh… I didn’t mean to.” Lin Hai waved his hands awkwardly.
“AHHH!!! I DON’T WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE!!!” Zhao Kun let out a shriek, jumped up clutching his crotch, dove into his car, and sped off in a cloud of dust.
“Hey, hey, wait for me! Dammit!” Meng Xu was dumbfounded as he watched Zhao Kun drive away.
“Hm?” Lin Hai finally noticed Meng Xu was there too—and he’d been meaning to find him anyway.
“You. Come here.” Lin Hai pointed at Meng Xu.
“Hai—Hai Ge.” Meng Xu saw Lin Hai calling him and scurried over with a fawning grin.
“What are you doing in Jiangnan City?”
“I came with Zhao Ying.”
“Zhao Ying?” Lin Hai remembered. “Didn’t I tell you last time to stop bothering her?”
“No, no, absolutely no bothering,” Meng Xu said, flinching and waving his hands frantically.
“Hai Ge, I’m pursuing Zhao Ying with my personal charisma now. No harassment at all.”
Pfft!
Lin Hai found that pretty amusing. Personal charisma? You’ve got about as much charisma as a brick.
Still, Lin Hai had only met Zhao Ying once, and saying this much was already enough.
“Ma’am, how did you train this dog? It’s so smart!”
“Seriously, this dog is amazing—almost like a person!”
“Look at how cocky it is! It’s like it understands every word we say. Oh, it’s just too cute!”
By now, the crowd had swarmed around Song Qin and Ahua.
Ahua, being the attention hog it was, absolutely thrived on all the praise. It rolled over, wagged its tail, and rubbed up against the legs of pretty young girls, sending the onlookers into peals of laughter.
Seeing Ahua behave so well and win so many hearts, Song Qin couldn’t stop grinning from ear to ear.
“That pervy mutt just loves showing off!” Lin Hai said with utter disdain.
“You. Get in my car!” Lin Hai waved Meng Xu over.
“Get in? No need, Hai Ge. I can just grab a taxi. I wouldn’t dare trouble you to drive me!” Meng Xu was flattered.
“Who said I’m driving you?” Lin Hai gave him a strange look. “Cut the chatter. Get in.”
“Huh? You’re not driving me?” Looking completely bewildered, Meng Xu climbed into Lin Hai’s car.
“Who told you to sit in the front? Back seat!”
“Oh, oh, back seat, back seat.” Meng Xu opened the rear door and slid in.
He’d barely sat down when Lin Hai followed him in and slammed the door shut.
“Take your pants off.”
Pfft!
Meng Xu nearly slid off the seat.
He looked up at Lin Hai with a pitiful expression, like a helpless girl about to be taken advantage of by a bully.
“Please… no, Hai Ge.”
“Tch, just take ’em off! Hurry up!” Lin Hai urged impatiently.
“Hai Ge…” Meng Xu put his hands over his mouth, looking so miserable he was almost in tears.
“Take ’em off or I’ll do it for you!” Lin Hai glared.
Meng Xu stared at him with teary eyes, went through a painful internal struggle, and finally gritted his teeth.
“Fine, fine, I’ll take them off, okay?”
With that, Meng Xu whipped his pants off in a few quick moves.
“Boxers too.”
“Come on, Hai Ge…”
“Less talk, more action.”
“Ugh!” Meng Xu stamped his foot and peeled off his boxers as well.
“Tch, don’t point that ugly thing at me. Turn around.”
Looking like he was about to cry, Meng Xu turned around and aimed his rear end at Lin Hai.
“Hai Ge, my tender little chrysanthemum is all yours. Be gentle with me, please… sigh.”
Pfft!
Lin Hai nearly threw up.
Gentle my foot!
What the hell are you thinking, man? My orientation is perfectly straight, thank you very much.
He stared at Meng Xu’s butt for a while, and the more he looked, the more certain he became.
“Yep, that’s definitely him.”
Still, just to be safe, he figured he’d better take a photo and confirm later.
“Stick it out and don’t move,” Lin Hai said as he pulled out his phone.
He opened the camera and aimed it at Meng Xu’s rear.
Meng Xu panicked the moment he saw that.
“No way, Hai Ge! You’ve got that kind of hobby? Remember what happened to Teacher Chen and his scandal photos—that’s a cautionary tale!”
Cautionary tale my butt!
“Stop squirming. Stay still.”
With that, click—Lin Hai snapped a shot.
“Change positions. One more!”
Click—he took another.
“Hai Ge, to be honest, I just applied for a job as one of those actors. If you’re really into my behind, I can have the director take some extra shots for you later. They’re way more professional than you.”
Pfft!
Wait, what? You applied to be one of those actors?
Lin Hai looked at Meng Xu and couldn’t help but laugh. What a freak—a big shot from the capital, and he goes and becomes that kind of actor. Now that’s something you don’t see every day.
“Alright, put your clothes back on and get out.”
“Huh? That’s it? If it’s just photos, you can take a few more, Hai Ge. I don’t mind.”
Pfft!
Tch, you don’t mind but I mind. Who the hell wants to look at your fat butt anyway?
Meng Xu sat up and started pulling his boxers back on.
He’d just gotten them up when the car door was yanked open from outside.
“Lin Hai! You can’t just park anywhere! Watch it, or I’ll—” Xu Tian stood outside the car, her little face all stern.
But before she could finish, she froze. Her eyes locked onto Meng Xu’s pants, which he was still pulling up, and they went wide.
“Uh, that’s not what it looks like…”
“You perverted freak!” Xu Tian shouted angrily and slammed the door shut with a bang.
