After a moment of silence, Gu Wan’er gripped the carbon fiber steering wheel and murmured, “She and I studied together since we were kids. She loved dancing, and I learned an instrument. I’d play, she’d dance. We were practically inseparable.”
Suddenly, an image of Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai appeared in Yu Xiaoduo’s mind.
“One time, my dad and I went to their house and talked about an arranged marriage. When she found out I was going to be her sister-in-law, she blew up on the spot. And her brother didn’t even object, which made her even more against it.”
“I made it clear I wouldn’t agree to it, but she thought I lied to her. Then our little friendship boat capsized. Every time we meet, she calls me a liar. It’s just so infuriating.”
Sitting in the passenger seat, Yu Xiaoduo had already gripped the armrest tightly. He quickly reminded her, “President Gu, we can be angry all we want, but ease up on the gas pedal.”
Gu Wan’er quickly let off the gas. She’d accidentally pushed it past a hundred.
“Don’t you think she’s got a screw loose? Was it really worth getting that angry?”
Yu Xiaoduo cleared his throat and said seriously, “Absolutely. She’s got a screw loose.”
Hearing Yu Xiaoduo agree with her made Gu Wan’er feel much better. Worthy of being half my man—he knows to take my side.
But Yu Xiaoduo was thinking, if you suddenly found out the person closest to you was mixed up with someone else, you probably wouldn’t feel too great about it—unless you’d had that idea from the start.
“But you two don’t even get along. Why would you introduce her to me?”
“So you can get back at her for me. That little brat needs a beating. She needs to be put in her place.”
“Does she also need to be… you know… pierced?”
Gu Wan’er’s mouth twitched. “Can you not be such a pervert? Her family’s loaded, she’s good-looking, and her dancing is genuinely something else. With a girlfriend like that, wouldn’t you be happy?”
“I’d have to be able to enjoy it first. Look at what I’ve got to enjoy it with. My equipment is all on you.” Yu Xiaoduo spread his hands. He didn’t even have his weapon anymore.
Gu Wan’er grinned. “How about I help you test it out first?”
“Gu Wan’er, I knew you had bad intentions. You’re addicted to being a man, aren’t you?”
Gu Wan’er clicked her tongue. “Who’d want to be a man?”
“Heh.” Yu Xiaoduo looked unconvinced.
But then Gu Wan’er flashed Yu Xiaoduo’s signature smile. “Xiaoduo.”
“Talk like a normal person!”
“Can we discuss something?”
“What?” Yu Xiaoduo asked curiously.
Gu Wan’er cleared her throat a few times, seeming a bit embarrassed. Finally, she said softly, “When there’s a chance, how about letting me be a real man for once?”
Yu Xiaoduo felt like he’d shattered into pieces. “I’ve never even been a real man! What makes you think you get to go first?”
“Then you go first, and then it’s my turn.”
“Have you been watching too much porn? You want to experience being a real man.” Yu Xiaoduo thought he was already twisted enough, but here was someone even worse.
“I’m just curious.”
“Kill that curiosity right now. Be a woman and be content with it.”
Gu Wan’er pouted. “Just kidding. Look at you getting all worked up.”
“Some people always use a joking tone to say what’s really on their mind.” Yu Xiaoduo figured he’d need to be careful from now on. He was worried she might actually go be a real man. But she could rest easy about him—he would absolutely never go be a real woman.
Gu Wan’er dropped Yu Xiaoduo off at her house. After getting out of the car, Yu Xiaoduo reminded her, “Don’t get any ideas about being a real man. If you dare do it, I’ll run naked around Longhai.”
Gu Wan’er’s mouth twitched. “I know. Can’t even take a joke. So lame.” With that, she hit the gas and drove off.
Watching the full-width taillight disappear, Yu Xiaoduo clicked his tongue. Looks like staying in his body had rubbed off some manly traits onto her.
So why hadn’t he picked up any feminine traits?
Yu Xiaoduo thought about this as he swayed his snake-like waist and walked into the villa.
That night, Yu Xiaoduo was disappointed. Sister Yun’er didn’t come home at all. With nothing to do, he could only lie on the couch and watch TV. After all, he was tired of Gu Wan’er’s body—he’d mastered everything there was to master. It had entered the fallow period.
On the other side, Gu Wan’er wasn’t like Yu Xiaoduo. As soon as she got home, she kept Yu Xiaoduo’s parents company. She was getting smoother and smoother at calling them Mom and Dad, and she had the two elders happy as could be. After dinner, she went out for a walk, chatted with Zhao Liang, and taught him how to chase older women. Suddenly, she felt like she was really good at pursuing girls.
Gu Wan’er suddenly understood—this was Yu Xiaoduo’s daily life. It was really so relaxing.
After the walk, she went home and watched spy dramas with the family, discussing the plot together. Gu Wan’er was even starting to like this lifestyle.
“Xiaoduo, I just saw a brand-new Porsche parked in your spot. Where’s your car?” Yu Taiduo asked curiously.
Gu Wan’er paused. “Last time I went out with Wan’er, she wrecked my car. It’s still in the shop being repaired, so she compensated me with a new one.”
“Oh, my silly son. How could you let your girlfriend pay for your car? If you had even a third of your dad’s skill at flirting, you wouldn’t still be single.” Tang Ling clutched her chest, frustrated at his lack of progress. Yu Taiduo, lying there, got caught in the crossfire. What did this have to do with him?
Gu Wan’er quickly explained, “Mom, it’s not what you think. Sure, she’s my girlfriend, but I’m great at my job. She’s the boss, so she has to give me a bonus. You can’t just skip the bonus because she’s my girlfriend, right? Right, Dad?”
“Xiaoduo’s got a point. That’s his skill too—getting a girl to buy him a car. Even I wasn’t that good,” Yu Taiduo said, patting Gu Wan’er on the shoulder with a teasing tone.
Sitting across from them, Tang Ling said sarcastically, “Yeah, someone at his peak had four boats at once. Compared to you, Xiaoduo is just so innocent.”
Gu Wan’er was shocked. No way. Uncle was actually a captain? Four boats? Even more impressive than her own dad.
“Don’t listen to your mom’s nonsense. Those were just my admirers. Your mom’s jealous.” Yu Taiduo looked at his wife as if he were gloating.
Suddenly, Tang Ling stood up with a stern face, scaring both Gu Wan’er and Yu Taiduo. Gu Wan’er now knew—when Auntie made that face, things were about to go wrong.
Sure enough, Tang Ling found the feather duster and cracked her knuckles. “That’s right, I’m jealous. Time for you to suffer.”
“Xiaoduo, quick, block your mom for me!” Yu Taiduo rolled away skillfully, looking pitiful.
“Mom, forget it, forget it. Dad knows he was wrong.”
Tang Ling’s face was dark, scaring Gu Wan’er. She immediately turned and advised surrender. “Dad, you’d better just admit you were wrong.”
“You little brat! Dad was sticking up for you!”
Uncle, Auntie is terrifying. I can’t afford to cross her.
That said, Gu Wan’er was having a great time. After all the noise and fun, she lay in bed with a happy smile on her face.
In her dream, Uncle and Auntie’s faces became her own parents’ faces, playing with her the same way. Yun’er was beside them too, laughing so hard she couldn’t close her mouth.
